gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize