Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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