Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
