You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
