Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
