Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
