plz talk dirty to me
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
She needs sedatives and a leash
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
