The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Randomize
