last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
