Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
