ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
