as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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