Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
