Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
