We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
