In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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