Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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