you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
