I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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