life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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