is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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