She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize