you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
