He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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