Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
