just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
