Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
