At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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