she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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