Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
