just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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