Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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