After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Randomize
