I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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