I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
