Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
