He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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