I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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