Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
