How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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