my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
