dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
apparently the secret to your success is patron
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
