Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
