the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
