You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
