hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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