The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize