problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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