Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
