How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize